Prediction (joke)

A teacher asked one of the boys in her class, "Can people
predict the future with cards?"

His response was, "My mother can."

The teacher replied, "Really?"

The young boy was quick to explain, "Yes, she takes one look
at my report card and tells me what will happen when my
father gets home

The homework (jokes)

Here is an explanation of the school homework policy for the average student. Students
should not spend more than ninety minutes per night. This time should be budgeted in the
following manner if the student desires to achieve moderate to good grades in his/her classes.

15 minutes looking for assignment.

11 minutes calling a friend for the assignment.

23 minutes explaining why the teacher is mean and just does not like children.

8 minutes in the bathroom.

10 minutes getting a snack.

7 minutes checking the TV Guide.

6 minutes telling parents that the teacher never explained the assignment.

10 minutes sitting at the kitchen table waiting for Mom or Dad to do the assignment.

How you made....?? (joke)

A young man asked an old rich man how he made his money.

The old guy fingered his worsted wool vest and said, "Well, son, it was 1932. The depth of the Great Depression. I was down to my last nickel.

"I invested that nickel in an apple. I spent the entire day polishing the apple and, at the end of the day, I sold the apple for ten cents.

"The next morning, I invested those ten cents in two apples. I spent the entire day polishing them and sold them at 5:00 pm for 20 cents. I continued this system for a month, by the end of which I'd accumulated a fortune of $1.37."

"And that's how you built an empire?" the boy asked.

"Heavens, no!" the man replied. "Then my wife's father died and left us two million dollars."

How's your mood????

This is the story about 4 people named: Everybody, Somebody,

Anybody, and Nobody.

- There was an important job to be done and Everybody was

sure Somebody would do it.

- Anybody could have done it, but Nobody did it.

- Somebody got angry about that because it was Everybody's job.

- Everybody thought Anybody could do it, but Nobody realized

that Everybody wouldn't do it.


- It ended up that Everybody blamed Somebody when Nobody

did what Anybody could have done.

Sunshine, moon light

In the beach, alone....with myself, thoughts around
my mind:
Love, live, laugh....Rules in the streets of our lives.
Sooner or later you must to choice....
this is a funny joke which one I remember when my mood
is down:

Two men were sentenced for 20 years to be in a single room with only one wish in each 10 years. The first man asked for as many books as he can put in his room, so he can read these books in next 10 years alone. The second one was a smoker as a habit. He asked for enough quantity of cigarettes for next 10 years. After giving the books and cigarettes, guardians closed and locked their doors. 10 years later it was the time to ask to the prisoners for their second wish for last 10 years. The first man asked for books again and a reading-glass. Then, they opened the door of the second prisoner and found him with all cigarettes and he was insane. They asked him for his second wish for the following 10 years.

"Lighter !!!...Lighter!!!" he said with a screaming voice.

=))